Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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