I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Randomize