I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
