NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
