I'm going to jail i love you
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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