Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
