You made me cry and you don't even care
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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