awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
