like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
This toilet bowl is my home.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
