there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
