Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
