Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize