We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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