i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
now i know why i became what i already was.
We got so high we made milksteak
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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