You're completely useless in the revolution.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
