I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize