That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
