He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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