He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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