the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
