dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
