Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Rumble strips road head = magical
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
