Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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