I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
