is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
