She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
