It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
foreskin is a definite game changer
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
