My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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