Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
