You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
