i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
