i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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