His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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