Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
