how can u be prego again
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Randomize