Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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