they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I don't think brook has ever known best
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Randomize
