Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
