thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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