i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
