There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
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