Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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