So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize