This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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