drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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