She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
