Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize