pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize