i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
A bitchslap is in order.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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