another moral hangover. fuck.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
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